Jenni Lind Photography

The birth of my first son was a difficult one. At 38 weeks pregnant, my midwife recommended inducing labor after it appeared Beckett had stopped growing. I’ve personally never been a fan of induction. From the start of my pregnancy, I was comforted by the thought of a completely natural birth for my child, and trusted my body to be capable of forming and bringing my baby into the world on its own. But the truth was, I was starting to lose faith in my body. We decided to proceed with regular office visits and tests to monitor everything. Beckett’s kicks were strong, but despite feeling confident that he was doing fine, the pressure to get him out was soon too much to handle. I was induced the night before I was officially two weeks overdue, and the experience was terrible.

Contractions were extremely powerful and so close together, there was barely an opportunity to breathe. Ryan and I were bewildered, unsure of how to proceed with confidence or a sense of peace. After 9 agonizing hours and my strength failing quickly, an epidural felt like the best option. My epidural worked perfectly; the pain was completely gone (unreal!), and I got hooked up to some machines, laid on my side, and slept until my midwife woke me up to let me know my baby was ready. His heart rate was dropping, so we needed to move quickly. I pushed for 5 or so minutes, and Beckett arrived with a full head of black hair, but not breathing. He was immediately taken from me to be resuscitated, and thankfully started breathing. He was beautiful, and we’ve been falling deeper in love with him ever since.

When I became pregnant with my second son, Miles, I wanted things to be different. I NEEDED things to be different. Admittedly, there were some things I really loved from my first birth despite how awful the induction was—I had a wonderful midwife, who was extremely supportive of all our decisions. I also found great comfort delivering in a hospital, since Ryan has severe congenital heart defects that were enough to give us pause when considering home birth. Still, I was so scared of not going into labor naturally, and frightened that I was on my way to another birth with more medical intervention than we wanted. We decided to hire a doula, after hearing that they were a Godsend for some women during labor, and man, we couldn’t’ve made a better decision.

Enza and I met fairly late into my pregnancy, but it felt as though we had known each other for years. She texted me regularly, asking how I was feeling and what exercises I was doing to get Miles into a good position. As it turns out, one reason babies go well past their due date is because their head isn’t in a good position to be born. And apparently you can fix that with lunges! Many, many lunges. When I went past my due date again, and induction was brought up at one of my appointments, Enza, along with my midwife, kept me encouraged and informed. When I finally went into labor on my own 2 weeks and a day past my due date (yay!) I couldn’t wait to have Enza coach Ryan and me. She didn’t leave my side from the moment she arrived at our home. She gave Ryan and me a level of confidence and determination that we didn’t have before. She pressed points on my back that decreased pain dramatically. She helped the hospital room feel like home. With every contraction, she seemed to know what was going on, and what our next step should be. She was sensitive, patient, and helpful. I never once thought about getting an epidural. The trust I wanted to have in my body was restored, and Miles was born screaming and beautiful.

Why do I share all of this on my blog? Because I believe in doulas, and want to share that. I believe every woman who goes into labor deserves a doula at her side—someone who has an intimate knowledge of labor and birth, and is an advocate for mothers and babies. Someone who won't judge a mom for the choices they make, but will do their best to make the birth exactly what the mother wants it to be. I had the birth I wanted with Miles, and because of that, things were different. Moving around with coaching from Enza during labor made things go quicker and smoother; it made me feel in control when in my first birth I felt out of control. Both Miles and Beckett are/were excellent at nursing, but Beckett took a lot more effort at first when I was already exhausted from his birth. Beckett was very sleepy when he was first born, Miles was extremely alert, which was important for our bonding. But most importantly, I was happier with everything after having Miles, which keeps things like postpartum depression at bay. (Even though I didn’t personally experience PPD with Beckett, it's an all too common struggle among mothers who feel unsupported in their birth experience.) Enza was a huge support for me during pregnancy, labor, and even now. I can't thank her enough for all that she does for moms.

I was so privileged to take some portraits of Enza a few weeks ago. It’s obvious that she has a wonderful, kind soul just seeing her smile, but hopefully my story solidifies how amazing she is. If you are pregnant in Massachusetts, give her a call! But if you’re pregnant anywhere, look into doulas. I promise, they're not as weird as their name might sound. ;) I also promise, you won’t be disappointed.

(Enza's Website)